are we caught in the middle?

Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender... without losing all control?

Fearless warriors in a picket fence,
Reckless abandon wrapped in common sense,
Deep water faith in the shallow end,
And we are caught in the middle.
With eyes wides open to the differences:
The God we want and the God who is,
But will we trade our dreams for His?
Or are we caught in the middle?
Are we caught in the middle? 

~Casting Crowns, "Somewhere in the Middle"

simply put

The Truth sets free. 
and Love never fails.

i used to want to be someone else...

corrie ten boom. betty stam.
amy carmichael. mary slessor.
jackie pullinger. mother teresa.
elisabeth elliot. gladys aylward.
women who've blessed & convicted me.

but then, He whispered, "But I didn't make you them.
I made you to be you. Wholly Mine. For My glory."

know what? He was right. (surprise, surprise)
and there is nobody i'd rather be...

incredible relationships. international adventure.
new experiences. stretching moments.
overwhelming challenges. eternal victories.
squeezing heart-ache coupled with intense love.
knowing exactly why i'm alive... purposed.
indescribable, divine joy in the journey.

nope. i wouldn't trade my life for anyone's.

"'cause i'm not who i was when i took my first step
and i'm clinging to the promise: You're not through with me yet...'"
(Ginny Owens, "If You Want Me To")

surrender + obedience = the adventure of a lifetime.
i dare you to try it... with this one warning:
you will never be the same again.

He never makes mistakes

"God never makes mistakes. But He often deals differently with His disciples. He lets them grope their way in the dark until they fully learn how blind they are, how helpless, how absolutely in need of Him. What His methods will be with you I cannot foretell. But you may be sure that He has a reason for everything He does. You may not understand why He leads you now in this way and now in that, but you may, nay, you must believe that perfection is stamped on His every act." ~E. Prentiss, Stepping Heavnward

Today, I really, really miss...

~My little Gracie hugs... now I have to make do with a long-distance Skype "ILY" wave...
~The camaraderie of African handshakes...
~Signing 24/7 -- like breathing in and out...
~Eating with my hands... while elbow deep in conversation...
~Living, thinking, be-ing Deaf...
~Deaf fellowship & worship... the real, solid deal... like the heaven-kind...
~My international Deaf family members and precious, beautiful friends...